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Click on the links above to see our "Wok-umentary" of our three month journey living in a bus as our family of five converts the world's first luxury motor home to run on free, waste vegetable oil, and then drive home, cross country on

The Fat Of America

July 25th, 2006
Location: Seattle, WA
Day 13

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-         Last night was quiet possibly the worst night of my adult life. Upon Chris Goodwin’s suggestion we decided to spend the night at the lot at which the bus is supposed to be kept while he does the conversion. Steve knew, but didn’t share, that there would be trains around. Well, two tracks were directly behind our bus – fright lines – and it seems that they do most of their business in the middle of the night…and of course there are spotlights illuminating the lot, and our bus, the entire night.

-         Oh, and let’s not forget that we have either a broken water pump or an empty fresh water tank, of course the black water tank on the other hand is full…

-         It was simply a horrible, horrible night

-         Right now we are sitting in Chris’ suburban, which he was kind enough to let us borrow for the time being. We are waiting for Steve to finish up with a dude who is fixing all the scratches we put into the bus…$600 later Steve is happy with the work the guy did.

-         We are still looking for a hotel to stay in while the work is being done on the bus…

-         Steve still has to work.

Later on Tuesday – Mossyrock

 

-         Well, well, well, just when you think it can’t get any worse…

-         We left Seattle in the hopes that Chris G. would complete the outside components of our conversion in about the next 1-2 weeks. One of the problems and reason for us physically leaving Seattle was that there are absolutely no hotels available in the entire greater Seattle area. I mean NO HOTELS AT ALL…finally I talked to a guy at the hotel hotline ad he said that there was a Microsoft Convention going on… I did find a hotel for $250 in Bellevue, but even that was crazy…I must have spent at least 2 hours on the phone alone, plus Steve’s time on the same project…the poor kids I feel so bad for them…they haven’t done or seen anything since we started this “adventure”…Steve STILL has to work…

-         The plan had been to find an RV park with WI/FI and spend 2 nights there. I picked a place called Mossyrock b/c it seemed beautiful and had internet access. I suggested a place closer to Seattle so we did have to drive so long and get to a place in the middle of the night, but Steve said no to that…of course, it was pitch dark when we got anywhere…Steve’s GPS ended up sending us the wrong way up a mountain side…at this point I woke up from being bounced up and down on the bed, we were way up some dirt road next to a field. It was absolutely impossible to see anything, I was scared to death. Not the last time either, as I was to find out. Again we decided to turn around and try and find another RV park.

-         I made Steve get out to check the ground to make sure that field was solid enough to support 40 tons…as we crawled down this mountain road, I am stunned that he made it up here in the first place.

-         Tired and dazed he says he saw another RV place on the way up here…on the way down we find it. As we drive in I realize that all the RVs are rusty old Junkers, the cars in front of them are in the same condition. We both recognize that we can’t stay there. We try to turn Elbee; it is very tight in there. Going around the last bend we drive by an RV a little ways off, the doors swinging in the wind, back and forth…no lights are on anywhere…we are both freaking out…thinking of cheesy old horror movies… we are both so tired, it’s so dark, we are scared…

-         Steve tries to snake his way out the last tight turn…we hear a crunch. Everything stops. While the kids are thankfully sleeping in the back bedroom, we are trying to figure out what we’ve just done…we hit one of two yellow metal posts, put there to protect a huge tree, and crush the right rear bay door. This seems especially bad since just this morning we paid $600 to get a big scratch fixed not two feet above from where now yawns the newest wound inflicted on our poor bus. Where I wonder is this going to end? Are we going to make it home with this thing in one piece? I am not at all certain about that.

-         Two guys come out of the main house on the property, at this point I am expecting chainsaws and metal hooks…

 

-         It turns out both of them are very sweet and help Steve maneuver out of this spot with lights and hand signals…

-         We make it out without any further incident and are dazed and bewildered by the time we are out on the empty, very dark road. Of course, we still have to find a place to stay for the night. Steve is beside himself b/c of the crushed cargo doors…he is beside himself with exhaustion…I punch in another RV park destination into his GPS and try to follow those directions. I don’t know what makes us think that this time that would be successful, because it takes not too long to realize that again we where send to nowhere…apparently this particular area of the country is very sketchy in this high tech contraption.  It sends us again into the middle of nowhere…we go on a little further and end up at the entrance to a State Park, which while maybe doable in daylight is completely out of the question right now. I am thoroughly fed up by now. I refuse to one inch into this woodsy, I am sure very lovely, park in the pitch black night. I make Steve turn around. The GPS, which by now we named Mary, has proven to be completely useless around here and so I try to simply navigate back to a main road.

-         This means that we have to cross back over a very narrow, long, unlit bridge out of here. The road extends in front of us into the darkness. To either side is what we know to be a lake, although what we can see is merely infinite blackness. With no other options we roll on over this daunting passage, knowing that Steve is exhausted, anxious about large bodies of water, unsure of the vehicle, pretty much lost in the woods, I am sensing something is not right with my hubby…this is when his general state of worry erupts into a full anxiety attack. He starts rocking back and forth on the stirring wheel, slowing down the bus as we come to the end of the narrow bridge. “Hit me…hit me,” he yells. To my surprise I do. I slap him on the back, and then harder on the side of his head…and amazingly he calms himself…he is back enough to cross that bridge. As we go on into the darkness I pet his head where I hit it, horrified that I did…

-         We end up in some lonely town (Salkim?) with a Fire station and a library.

-         Steve is obsessed with finding a place that has a spigot – we still don’t have water – and I don’t care at this point. The dishes are piled high in the sink and we all need showers, but somehow that no longer is at the top of my list anymore…finally I persuade him to pull into the parking lot of the Fire station and fall into bed. It’s 12:30 am and it’s got to be enough for one day…

-          

 

As Anke says in her notes above, this was perhaps one of the worst nights in our life.

Nothing seems to be happening for my installation.  Chris says he needs different people to get back to him for answers regarding the thickness of the unprecedented huge fuel tank, the special valves, the engine people needed to answer some questions.  To me, it just felt like I was waiting with my entire family, rotting away, trapped.

Chris found a place for us to keep Elbee at night.  It was behind a boat fabrication shop, about ten feet in front of a very active train track.  We found out how active that night, when every 20 minutes or so, what sounded like certain, painful death would shake our 21 ton motor home

 

Chris found a guy who would come and paint the scratch I put in Elbee the first night I had her.  It cost me $603, and they did a great job painting across several different colored  stripes. 

Life's irony would have it that it was this night, when we left Seattle in a fury, that we smashed the battery doors and put thousands of dollars of damage in Elbee on the awful, Dawn of The Dead, mountain  trailer park. (read Anke's notes, above)


Perhaps one of the lowest points of the trip was when we found that we could not get a hotel room anywhere near Seattle.  Chris still had not given me a price or firm commitment on doing the conversion, and we ran out of fresh water.  This meant that we could not even flush the toilet.

What is more amazing is that the place we were parked was owned by a son of a bitch who did not let me have any water  from his tap just a few yards from the bus.  As if Seattle were a desert region, where water were scare and expensive. 

I sat in the heat, with my family innocently playing in the back, wondering what have I done.  I felt an anxiety attack come over me like I have not had since that time I left the urine sample in the fridge, next to the apple juice.

I dragged my family out here, and now we are in a hot bus with no water, the toilet was overflowing and smelling in Seattle's worst heat wave in years, with no definite plans on converting Elbee, having just spent over $100K

No hotel rooms.. This was not sustainable We simply had to go.

I called Chris and said, "Listen, I am sorry, this is not going to work."  He said he would be right down, and in one of the first times he actually made true, he appeared at the lot about 25 minutes later. 

I explained to him that I was freaking out, and that we simply had to keep driving in order to survive.  I said that I still wanted to do the conversion, but I need to  come back when he is ready to give me full attention and have the raw supplies ready, and maybe I could even get a quote on how much this whole thing is going to cost me.

He said that he needed two weeks.  Perhaps he was secretly hoping that I would have given up and just driven back east, but I said that we were crazier than that, and we will be back two weeks from today, and will move forward.

So, it was agreed, I would simply travel up and down the west coast, killing time for two weeks, when we would then come back and expect some conversion loving!

About ten minutes after Chris left, we were getting ready to take our stinking, wretched bus out of Seattle, destination unknown.

To my surprise, I look up and I see Chris' car speed up towards  me again. 

I though for a moment that he was coming fast around the corner, going to kick the shit out of me for being such a pain in the ass and leaving after he went out of his way to find me a place to stay, and lend me his car.  He is about 6' 4", 240, and I am 5' 10" and come from a long lineage of accountants and lawyers, so I was looking for any stray chains of hammers to hold - though I was certain they would just end up being used against me.

To my amazement, he was driving quickly as so not to miss us.  He came with a couple of bags.  Inside were a couple of bagels and cream cheese for the kids, some bottles of cold apple juice for each kid, and a couple of gallons of bottled water.  He said that denying a man water is one of the most insulting and universally horribly wrong things another human can do.

I swear, I am getting misty again now, just writing this, I was very moved.  We were so far away, in such a bad place, and this simple gift of water proved to be one of the most reveling indications of Chris' integrity. 

Here is JuJu drinking from one of those expensive, delicious, cold apple juice bottles right before we left Seattle- not knowing if we would ever be back.

This is the dude's exotic car shop, where I was refused water for my family.

Anke had to talk me down from dumping our festering contents of our Black Water tank on his front yard.  75 gallons of hot, liquid thank you!

If you ever happen to be in the Fisherman's Warf area of Seattle and see this guy, please give him my best.